About Us

Saint Tom is the contemplative yet unexpectedly electrifying CEO of Vaticon, the world's only monk-led holy-water bottling enterprise with a flair for the dramatic. Renowned in the Cloister of Stillwater for his spiritual devotion and his… unconventional hobbies, Saint Tom divides his time between meditation, improvisational saxophone solos, and building devices that involve truly alarming amounts of electricity.

Before founding Vaticon, Saint Tom made his mark in the monastery through his sunrise interpretive dance performances—rituals he describes as "kinetic prayers"—and his persistent attempts to "ethically harness lightning" for spiritual enhancement. While other monks brewed tea, Tom tinkered with coils, capacitors, and the occasional questionable transformer.

Vaticon was born in 2016, during a moment of revelation that occurred when Saint Tom simultaneously achieved inner stillness and received a mild electric shock. He became convinced that the monastery's blessed aquifer could bring harmony, clarity, and perhaps a gentle buzz of spiritual excitement to the wider world.

As CEO, Saint Tom fuses ancient traditions with his unique brand of creative chaos. Board meetings begin with interpretive dance warm-ups, quarterly updates are sometimes accompanied by soulful saxophone interludes, and every bottle of holy water undergoes a purification ritual rumored to involve chanting, prayer, and at least one high-voltage device.

Despite his eccentric leadership, Saint Tom remains a humble monk at heart, guided by his signature mantra: "Purity flows eternal—especially when properly grounded."